


Ghosts of Past and Present

by sunrise_and_death



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Christianity, Christmas, Dysfunctional Family, Family Feels, Gen, Holidays, Rated Teen literally only for language, it doesn't actually have anything to do with A Christmas Carol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-20 10:03:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17020590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunrise_and_death/pseuds/sunrise_and_death
Summary: Nicky wants all the magic of Christmas. Aaron wants a real Christmas. Andrew wants nothing at all.





	Ghosts of Past and Present

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Leahelisabeth (fortheloveofcamelot)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/fortheloveofcamelot/gifts).



> Written for leahlisabeth for the 2018 AFTG Holiday Exchange for their prompt "Pre canon Twinyards Christmas with Nicky." Hope you enjoy it and happy holidays!

As a kid, Nicky loved Christmas.

To be fair, most kids loved Christmas. But most kids loved Christmas because of Santa Claus and stockings and presents under the Christmas tree. Nicky loved those things too, but what he loved most about Christmas was the night before, when his father would get out the big family bible and read the story of the nativity.

His father was a minister, so Nicky was used to hearing him preach in church. But it was different at home, when it was just the three of them. Luther’s voice rumbled with mysticism as he read about Mary and Joseph, the three wise men, the angel Gabriel, and little baby Jesus in the manger. Curled up by his mother, Nicky drank it in with the eagerness of a true believer.

After, he’d lay in bed and imagine it again and again until it seemed like he had lived it. He could smell the musky farm animals, hear Mary’s birthing screams, see the dimples in the little baby’s cheeks.

Like everything else, Christmas didn’t stay magical for him. After he told them, his father and mother started going out caroling on Christmas Eve instead of staying home. His fantasies of the nativity seemed hollow. The big family bible was just proof of his eternal damnation.

And like everything else, it was Erik who brought the magic back. They spent their first Christmas Eve together in bed, whispering stories back and forth. At Erik’s request, Nicky retold the story of Jesus’s birth his way, and Erik laughed and kissed him and told him Nicky gave him faith in the goodness of all things. Nicky had never been happier.

Back in Columbia, he ached for that. But Erik couldn’t fly out, so it was just Nicky and the twins.

“I want to make it magical for them,” Nicky told Erik, during one of their hourlong phone calls. They were horrifically short. “I want to hang lights. And get a tree! The whole shabang. But they’re so—”

He’d tried to describe the twins to Erik a thousand times. The simplest way of putting it was that the twins were really, really fucked up.

“I’m sure they’ll love it,” Erik assured him. “How could they not? Everyone loves Christmas.”

“Yeah, you haven’t met my cousins,” Nicky said.

 

* * *

 

His mother hadn’t believed in Christmas. Aaron had vague memories of a plastic tree one year, but that was it. Most of the time, she’d just been irritated that he was home and not in school for two weeks.

When he was little, he liked watching all the commercials and movies about Christmas, though. It seemed like some kind of fairy tale he could stumble into if he tried hard enough. The bitterness came later, and it stayed.

Still, sometimes he had fantasies about it: a white Christmas, tucked away in some cabin in the mountains, with a giant tree and eggnog and a girl in a cozy sweater next to him, laughing and looking up at him with warm eyes. The girl was the important part, really—he daydreamed about Easter and Thanksgiving and Fourth of July too, imagining her there with him. She’d take it for granted that they’d have big, traditional holidays, and she’d be so excited to share them with him.

He was starting to think he could actually have that, maybe, in the future. Already, he’d had an offer; after a month of dating on the sly, Maggie had asked him to come over to her place for Christmas dinner. “I told my parents about you,” she confided, fingers tangling in the thin material of his sweatshirt. “How your mom is gone and you don’t really have a place to go. They’d love to have you.”

Aaron’s chest had warmed and he’d carried the secret around like something precious for a week. Then Andrew had found out and ruined everything. Like usual.

When Aaron told Nicky, his cousin bit his lip, looking torn. “Oh,” he said. “That sucks.” He brightened. “But it’s okay! I was thinking we’d have Christmas here, you know, stockings and lights and everything. All three of us!” He visibly reined in his excitement, shooting Aaron a sideways look. Aaron regretted all his choices. “Unless you don’t want to, of course. I can figure something else out.”

Aaron looked down at his feet and scuffed them against the linoleum of the kitchen floor. “No,” he said grudgingly. “Christmas here sounds good.”

 

* * *

 

Andrew had had one real Christmas. Unsurprisingly, it was with Cass.

It hadn’t been a big deal to him. He couldn’t remember ever really longing for Christmas; he’d stopped caring far before that. He knew the uselessness of wanting things he couldn’t have.

But he’d liked how happy it made Cass. She lit up from the inside as she bustled around the house readying things, Andrew on her heels. Together, they made gingerbread and ate half of it before Richard got home. Afterwards, Cass ruffled his hair fondly. “You’re a good influence,” she told him.

“You mean a bad one.”

“No.” She drew out the word, the corners of her mouth curling up. “Anyone who encourages gingerbread eating is a good influence in my book.”

It had been a good Christmas. For the most part.

Watching Nicky and Aaron attempt to string lights on their mangy Christmas tree, Andrew didn’t have much hope for this one.

Aaron wasn’t talking to him, so it took more than twenty minutes for Nicky to turn with a strained smile and say, “Andrew, if you could hold this over here, it would be super helpful.”

There was no reason to do it, other than to stay in Nicky’s good graces, which was easy enough to do anyways. But he had nothing else to do either, so he went as directed and stood there holding the lights like a statue.

“Well, that’s—” Nicky started with mild exasperation and then cut himself off. Like the busy little worker bee he was, he buzzed around Andrew and Aaron, occasionally telling them to move or hold something or unhook something or—

Aaron glowered at Andrew the whole way through, as if it was his fault personally that they’d gotten this tree and failed miserably at it. But like Andrew, he kept standing there until Nicky pronounced himself satisfied.

He tried to wrap an arm around both of their shoulders. Aaron permitted it, but Andrew stepped away. Nicky’s right arm fell uselessly to his side.

“There we go,” said Nicky cheerfully. “Now that we have the tree, we can have a real Christmas.”

 

* * *

 

There only ended up being a few gifts under the tree. And Nicky’s attempts at cooking left something to be desired. The stockings were completely forgotten about until the night before, and so they hung empty. The three of them gathered together for only a couple hours before dispersing back to their rooms.

Still, Nicky told Erik it had been a success. “We were all there, together,” he said. “That’s the important thing, don’t you think?”

On the other side of the Atlantic, Erik curled his hand lovingly around his phone and pressed it harder to his cheek. “Yes. Yes, absolutely.”

**Author's Note:**

> You can find me on Tumblr at @sunrise-and-death. Thanks for reading!


End file.
